The Loony Lampoonist

Shoot Me Up

It is not a little known fact that the Loony Lampoonist makes an appearance in cinemas to catch the latest blockbusters on the big screen. While it has been alleged that the real reason behind the parodist's frequent visits to the theatres are to allay vile rumours that he supports the cause of the 21st century pirates by downloading the latest films off the interweb and watches them at his private home theatre in the company of women, he has denied them time and again. "My computer is loaded to the teeth with pornography. I couldn't find a few measly bytes of space to download pirated films even if I wanted to", is his usual riposte.

Rumours of piracy notwithstanding, we decided to accompany the Loony Lampoonist on a viewing of one of this years most anticipated films, Shoot 'Em Up. This man, renowned to come up with witty remarks during the course of a film screening entertaining the viewers in his immediate vicinity decided, however, to stay quiet during this film. "The guns do all the talking", he said, "So there ain't going to be a verbal barrage from me"

So we bought our buttered popcorn (I should watch my weight, Butter makes my anorexic body bloat up, My boyfriend won't like it surely, Oops shush, the film is about to start now, Shut up and watch) and sat down to watch Shoot 'Em Up.

At the end of the film, this reporter had her own opinions on it, but like the other opinion floating in her thought process that she had gobbled too much popcorn and was looking fat already, it was not relevant in the scope of this article and wouldn't need to be mentioned.

As we walked out of the cinema hall, I looked at the the Loony Lampoonist. He had a pale expression on his face. We asked him what he thought about the film.

He replied, "It's a wonder they didn't find me shot dead with a pistol in my hand in the theater today. The truth is, I wasn't armed"

posted by foogarky @ 1:30 PM,


At 1:48 AM, Blogger taurius1 said...

OMG the loony lampoonist is so sexy!!!

Regular James Bond type guy.
Those moves.. that style!!!


At 10:01 AM, Blogger Otis B Driftwood said...

I seemed to have missed commenting on this one... Amen!


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The Author


foogarky is the pseudonym of the fictional construct who battles for supremacy with other constructed personas in the mind of a crazed individual. He describes himself as a man living in a non descript house in Rio De Janiero, Brazil with two dogs and a parakeet.

About This Blog

The Loony Lampoonist serves to parody, spoof and satirize everything that needs to be parodied, spoofed and satirized. Due to the fictional nature of this electronic journal, any anecdotes appearing here ever so often that seem to be personal in nature, would suffer from the effects of conflicting personalities, the creation of fictional events and the inclusion of non existent characters who did not make it to the big league in the author's literary works. Thus, the Loony Lampoonist is also a purgatory for characters and ideas that have missed the limelight.

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The Loony Lampoonist Inc. is a no-hope-of-profit organisation dedicated to distorting fiction for the purposes of satire and parody. We welcome donations to cover our operation costs and ridiculously high legal expenses. All donations are tax-deductible in the Bahamas. If your tightwaddery gets the better of you, we can offer an alternative. Offer us a few words of encouragement in our Shout Box and we'll survive on that. That and oxygen.

Dedicated to

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    Conan the Cimmerian


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